Saying yes is saying no.

Welcome to your Wednesday Museletter!

First, here's what's alive in my ecosystem this week...

🪶 I've loved getting to know Indigenous Practitioner Alyx Somas this year. Alyx is a clear channel of wisdom who brings a genuine humility and potent passion for unification in an increasingly divisive world. They are launching several juicy offerings this fall:

• Restored Relations: A series of initiations with the Spirit of Collective Liberation for our life’s time-line, from childhood to elderhood.

• Sacred Gifts, Resilient Kids: Pan-indigenous life-ways + nervous system regulation for children.

• Reclaiming Wholeness: 1:1 Decolonial Healing w/ compassionate attunement + eco-somatic practice. People of all heritages + genders are welcomed. 

• Read details for these potent healing containers here.

Onward! 🕊️

Last week, I asked my clients to share their biggest questions and challenges around TIME with me.

Someone shared that she is rumbling with the realization that saying “yes” to something means she is, in fact, saying “no” to something else.

As a mother of a growing teenage daughter, she had tears in her eyes as she shared the rapidfire reality of her sweet girl growing up before her eyes… and how challenging it is to reign in her enthusiasm for various activities and opportunities so she can spend more time with her daughter while it’s still readily available.

Another was making bank with her small permanent jewelry business, but after a year of hustling she realized that the cost of making those extra dollars wasn’t just exhaustion, but also the time she was essentially choosing not to spend with her two daughters under the age of 7. 

These two stories share a common thread and function as a cautionary tale:

When I say yes to a side hustle, I say no to more time with my daughters.

When I say yes to attending a retreat, I say no to an extra weekend with my teenager.

This is tender ground, right?

Non-parents (myself included) also get to rumble with the big trade-offs we make everyday with our decisions.

Saying YES to one thing always means we are saying no to something else.

This presses on a wound that I name in my ‘Time is your Ally’ workshop as the false belief that “I can and must do it all.”

Don’t get me wrong. I am a dreamer and an idealist, and I enthusiastically take on multiple endeavors at once… but it’s a slippery slope.

Take one step too far into the overcommitment territory, and suddenly you’re too overwhelmed to actually show up for anything you’ve committed to.

This is where RESOLVE comes in.

Here’s two questions to ask when debating your yes:

1. Are you wholeheartedly all in? Or are you halfheartedly making this decision?

2. Do you actually have space on your calendar to devote? Or will you commit, then fail to show up?

On the flip side, when we say NO to something, we are saying yes to something else.

Here’s a reframe when doubting your no:

Part of our inclination to overbook ourselves is based in FOMO—so while you are “missing out” on the thing you’re turning down, what are you actually saying yes to as you decline that opportunity? Identify what you are saying yes to as you say no to something else, and notice if that brings more peace in your decision-making process.

Hit reply and let me know if this was helpful!

While you’re at it, what's your current biggest challenge with time?

And hey, do me a favor and be specific. I love addressing your conundrums and it really helps to have the details.

To choosing powerfully,